“Wuthering Heights” is based on a classic novel by Emily Brontë. I’ve never read the novel, which is probably for the best. Reports of the movie differing from the novel are actually quite relieving to me. They’re relieving in the sense that I do not have to lose respect for people who like the novel, which I would do if this movie were any indication of its quality. I’m fine with not judging a book by its movie, especially when the movie is this terrible.

Young Catherine Earnshaw (Charlotte Mellington) grows up in the Wuthering Heights estate in 18^th-century England, under the care of her rich, cruel, drunken father (Martin Clunes). Servants include same-aged companion Nelly (Vy Nguyen) and rescued street urchin Heathcliff (Owen Cooper). Cathy initially sees Heathcliff as her “toy,” but eventually comes to see him as a friend. As the two get older and Cathy turns into Margot Robbie and Heathcliff turns into Jacob Elordi, they both begin to think that they might become more than friends. It’s hard for me to buy Robbie, who played Leonardo DiCaprio’s wife in “The Wolf of Wall Street” back in 2013, as someone who is just now going through a sexual awakening, but sure, Cathy and Heathcliff are in love, but neither of them will admit it or make the first move.

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The problem with such a relationship would be the financial aspect. Cathy’s father has gambled away the family’s fortune, leaving them both “near-poverty,” and Heathcliff, as a servant, has practically nothing. Cathy confides in Nelly (now played by Hong Chau), with Heathcliff overhearing, that she needs to marry someone with money, like wealthy neighbor Edgar (Shazad Latif). She goes on to admit that she’d rather marry the broke Heathcliff, but he misses that part. Heathcliff abandons Wuthering Heights the next day and Cathy goes on to marry Edgar.

At first, Cathy loves all the material trappings of her marriage (this portion of the film does some impressive things with the “wealth porn” element, with fine foods and flowers everywhere), but she just can’t bring herself to reciprocate Edgar’s love. A pregnancy makes her feel even more trapped. Soon after, Heathcliff returns, a wealthy man. He and Cathy could be together if it weren’t for that pesky lifetime commitment she made. Their workaround is to have an affair. When Cathy wants to cut things off (due to her pregnancy, not fidelity), Heathcliff gets revenge by marrying Edgar’s naïve ward Isabella (Alison Oliver) and treating her horribly. This is supposed to entice Cathy to come back to him… somehow.

Can Cathy and Heathcliff’s game of sexual chess end well for either of them? That’s the question I think we’re supposed to be asking. I was much more concerned about how things would end for well-meaning pawns Edgar and Isabella. Cathy and Heathcliff turn each other into monsters by the end, and not in a tragic, understandable way – more like they’re locked in a contest to see who can be the bigger spoiled brat. Cathy grew up a spoiled brat, but Heathcliff watched her and learned from the best. Speaking of “brat,” I liked the snippets of Charli XCX songs that played throughout the film, usually in scenes of heavy fog that seemed to match the singer’s breathy voice. Maybe she should have played Cathy.

“Wuthering Heights” is a movie about two people who deserve each other. At first, this can be said with positive connotations that slowly turn to negative. Because there are so many erotic scenes with the main characters in fancy costumes, this movie is supposedly “romantic.” I’m worried about what young romantics will take away from this movie, considering how many of them came out of last year’s “Nosferatu” with a crush on Count Orlok. I walked away from this film wanting both main characters to fall from a height – Wuthering or otherwise.

Grade: C-

“Wuthering Heights” is rated R for sexual content, some violent content, and language. Its running time is 136 minutes.

Contact Bob Garver at rrg251@nyu.edu.